There’s a lot of talk about Trump’s endorsement of a new God Bless the USA bible . I’m sure God is grateful. Most outsiders to American Christianity are probably unaware of the fact that selling Bibles is a huge business in this subculture and that there is a dizzying number of bible versions and editions. A bible version is a unique translation of the original Greek and Hebrew texts that Christians regard as inspired. These versions are identified by acronyms like: KJV – The King James Version NIV – The New International Version ESV – The English Standard Version NKJV – The New King James Version NASB – New American Standard Bible NRSV – New Revised Standard Version And that’s just the most popular ones. I count 65 English versions of the Bible at biblegateway.com. Every major branch of Christianity and Judaism has their own version, of course. They all say about the same thing, but there are some minor choices that are important to different groups. The King James Version is still the most popular of all, with a 50% market share. This is odd given that it was translated in England in 1611, under the reign of its eponymous sponsor and it uses the antiquated language that we are all used to hearing from Shakespeare. In the KJV you will find sentences like these: He that is surety for a stranger shall smart for it: and he that hateth suretiship is sure (Proverbs 11:15). He maketh a path to shine after him; one would think the deep to be hoary (Job 41:32). Ye are not straitened in us, but ye are straitened in your own bowels. Now for a recompense in the same, (I speak as unto my children,) be ye also enlarged (2 Corinthians 6:12-13). This last one is said to be Trump’s favorite bible verse. There is fervent debate among Christians about the KJV. Some claim that God oversaw its translation directly so that it has God’s, in addition to Trump’s, endorsement as the authoritative version of the Bible. Others point out that the KJV translation was based on a handful of manuscripts and that subsequent scholarship has provided far mor accurate Greek and Hebrew texts. It seems clear to me that fans of the KJV have become enamored with its unique vocabulary and style. Although it was written in the contemporary language of the 17th century, it now sounds magisterial and the language feels appropriately mysterious and majestic as a vehicle for the words of God. And so of course the Trump endorsed Bible would use the KJV. It is the Bible of the most conservative and least educated Christians, those who put unthinking conservative symbolism above any rational considerations. These are also the most ardent Trump supporters. Study Bibles The other part of the bible market is Study Bibles. These are editions that are pitched to different interests or genders or stages of life. The list of these is truly encyclopedic. If you start high school, it might be time for The NIV Teen Study Bible. Are you interested in apologetics? The Apologetics Bible is for you! Are you a man? Perhaps you need the Rooted study bible for men! (Leathersoft, brown, comfort print). It can be fun to think of random things that there might be study bibles for and see if Google spits them back at you. But make sure that your study bible uses the right version! Perhaps the most hilarious title is The Queen James Bible. That one is fabulosa! So, just to be clear, the Trump Bible (as I will now forever affectionately call the God Bless the USA Bible) is not exactly an innovation. For the last 50 or 60 years bible publishers have been pumping out Bibles for every occasion. Soon, perhaps, for every gender. But hasn’t bible sales always had a scent of the unseemly hovering over it? Honestly, Trump as a bible peddler is poetic genius. The innovation of the Trump bible is that it brilliantly combines several other historical texts that are also, like the King James Version, difficult to understand, probably for the most part unread, and pack a symbolic punch: The US constitution, the Bill of Rights, The Declaration of Independence, and the Pledge of Allegiance. But to those KJV reading MAGA fundamentalists who sit down to read these documents, I want to say: good luck. Some will try, but are bound to fall asleep at passages like this one, from The Constitution: The Migration or Importation of such Persons as any of the States now existing shall think proper to admit, shall not be prohibited by the Congress prior to the Year one thousand eight hundred and eight, but a Tax or duty may be imposed on such Importation, not exceeding ten dollars for each Person. This tediously worded text is only of interest in specific legal contexts, where it is of course tremendously important, but it is a complete non-starter for the average fundamentalist KJV reader. The idea that anyone is going to read these texts somehow in coordination with the Bible is ludicrous. A few idealistic people might think this will happen, but I guarantee that when butt hits easy chair and the reading starts attention will wander very quickly. All symbol, no substance I think that there are striking congruencies between how evangelicals treat these two bodies of texts, the books of the Bible and the founding documents of the US. On the one hand, both collections are adored as sacred; on the other hand, they mostly function as symbolic pieces of memorabilia which have come to represent a set of cultural values that are not clearly set forth in their pages. The God Bless the USA Bible edition is nothing more than a bundle of symbolism. No one is going to conveniently carry it around, due to its thin, convenient size (as the ad envisions), to study and read the word of God or the words of the founding fathers. This bible is a badge of belonging, and the culture that parades this symbolism is oddly disconnected from both the political and religious content of the texts it celebrates. This brings me to the idea of highlighting parts of the Trump Bible. It is a common enough practice, in study bibles. Like the KJV Study Bible for Mechanics, where it highlights Acts 2:1 “and they were all in one accord.” (I’m really, really sorry for that pun. I am hanging my head in shame right now.) Why not also highlight some important passages in this edition? Since conservative fundamentalist Christians value the teachings of these texts, they would surely enjoy seeing the relevance of some sections to contemporary political and cultural issues. After all, this is the word of God, and of Godly men. Here are some suggested passages: Judgment in Cases of Impeachment shall not extend further than to removal from Office, and disqualification to hold and enjoy any Office of honor, Trust or Profit under the United States: but the Party convicted shall nevertheless be liable and subject to Indictment, Trial, Judgment and Punishment, according to Law (US Constitution, Article 1, section 3). All liars shall have their part in the lake which burneth with fire and brimstone: which is the second death (Revelation 21:8). Marriage is honourable in all, and the bed undefiled: but whoremongers and adulterers God will judge (Hebrews 13:4). No person shall be a Senator or Representative in Congress, or elector of President and Vice-President, or hold any office, civil or military, under the United States, or under any State, who, having previously taken an oath, as a member of Congress, or as an officer of the United States, or as a member of any State legislature, or as an executive or judicial officer of any State, to support the Constitution of the United States, shall have engaged in insurrection or rebellion against the same, or given aid or comfort to the enemies thereof. But Congress may by a vote of two-thirds of each House, remove such disability (14th Amendment, section 3). Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion (First Amendment). Ye have heard that it hath been said, Thou shalt love thy neighbour, and hate thine enemy. But I say unto you, Love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you (Matthew 5:43-44). Each State shall appoint, in such Manner as the Legislature thereof may direct, a Number of Electors (Article 2, Section 1 of The Constitution).